Step 1: Embrace the inane wackiness that is Land of the Lost. Seriously, you need to chuck any rational thought and just let yourself enjoy this one – and don’t feel ashamed about it.
Step 2: Repeat after Dr. Rick Marshall: “Matt Lauer can SUCK it!” Dr. Marshall (Will Ferrell) is considered a joke in the scientific community for his theories on time travel and alternate universes – even Matt Lauer makes fun of him on the Today Show. But Marshall sure shows them when, armed with his tachyon meter, he is sucked into a space vortex and lands in a strange new Land with dinosaurs, monkey people, lizard people and other lost artifacts from the real world – such as a Bob’s Big Boy statue and a motel pool. Lauer can indeed suck it. Along with Marshall to document his findings is his research assistant Holly (Anna Friel) and Will (Danny McBride), a redneck tour guide who is in the wrong place at the wrong time.
Step 3: Refer to Step 1. So, the plot is pretty stupid, but there are individual moments that might make you laugh your ass off: Marshall exclaiming “Captain Kirk’s nipples!” and mouthing “F**k you” to Chaka (Jorma Taccone); the T-Rex getting pissed off at Rick for saying he has a brain the size of a walnut (don’t ever do that if you come face to face with a T-Rex); the tachyon meter playing A Chorus Line show tunes; Rick, Will and Chaka getting wasted on some native fruit and having a time of it in the motel pool; Rick deciding to disguise his smell with dino urine. Come on, this is pure comic genius!
Step 4: If you are old enough, reminisce about the cheesy ’70s TV show. I did. The whole time I was watching Land of the Lost. This big-screen treatment pays complete homage: the rubber raft falling down a waterfall; Holly’s braids; little hairy monkey Chaka; the Sleestaks (or as Chaka calls them “Chorizo tacos”); the crystal pylons; the theme song sung sweetly by Rick while an abnormally large mosquito sucks out most of his blood. Good times.
Step 5: Remember this: A movie is only as good as its parts – Land of the Lost‘s parts being Ferrell, Friel, McBride and Taccone. Friel (Pushing Daisies) has the unenviable position of playing the straight woman to that eclectic trio of men and handles herself the best she can. Ferrell, well, he continues to play the well-intentioned idiot like only he can, while McBride hones his well-intentioned local yokel. Taccone, best known as the third part in Andy Samberg’s Lonely Island group (“Dick in a Box”), provides a nice addition to the insanity as the horny Chaka. He and McBride’s Will form a particularly special bond.
Level of difficulty in watching Land of the Lost: Moderately easy, like the summer breezes that make me feel fine, blowing like the Jasmin in my mind. But you must realize I’m not normal.
